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The Searcher

THE NORTHERN KENTUCKY SEARCHER
"Search the scriptures: for in them ye think ye have eternal life: and they are they which testify of me. " (John 5:39)

VOLUME 3, NUMBER 5, MARCH 1, 2003

THE MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP

(PART 5)

            As we turn our attention to the woman in the marriage relationship, we do so recognizing that what God actually has to say about her position and her function within the family has been under tremendous attack.  My heart goes out to the godly woman in the marriage relationship – a woman whose price is “far above rubies” ( Proverbs 31:10).  Her invaluable contributions to society are not recognized and appreciated by those in the world and are becoming less and less appreciated by those in the church.  She is, however, a woman whom God calls “blessed” and worthy of praise.  

            1 Peter 3:1-6, tells us, “Likewise ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation (manner of life, g.l.) of the wives; while they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.  Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting of hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; but let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.  For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.”  

            The woman’s place in the marriage and the home can be summarized by the word “subjection”.  It is, first and foremost, subjection to the will of God and His will is that she be in subjection to her husband.  The husband also must be in subjection to the will of God, and it is His will that the man be the head of the family.  In Ephesians 5:22-24, Paul wrote, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of the body.  Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.”  In the marriage relationship the man cannot abdicate his position of headship; nor can the woman usurp that position and still be in subjection to the will of God.   

            This position of subjection does not mean that the woman in the marriage relationship is secondary to the man.  It does not mean that she is less important than the man, less skilled than the man, less intelligent than the man.  It does not mean that she is “less” anything in God’s eyes, with the exception of being physically weaker.  Peter wrote in 1 Peter 3:7, “Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.”  Being physically weaker, it is God’s will that the husband treat her with honor, or greater care.  Shame on any man who would ever raise his hand in anger against his wife and strike her with it.  

            The position of subjection is one of function.  The man and the woman are equal in God’s eyes.  Speaking of salvation, of being “in Christ”, Paul wrote, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus” (Gal. 3:28 ).  However, each has a different role to perform.  

            The true beauty of a woman in the marriage relationship is not seen merely by looking at her physical appearance, although she does take care of herself; it is seen by who and what she is.  She adorns herself with that which is truly beautiful, a meek and quiet spirit.  Manifesting that meek and quiet spirit she exerts a tremendous influence for good upon her husband.  Oh, that women of today could understand that!  Being the godly wife that God desires is not being a mousey nobody who exists for no other purpose than to fulfill every whim of her husband.  She is to be a “help meet” for him.  She was created from him and for him and they perfectly compliment each other.  Peter even made the point that if she should be married to one who is not a Christian, one who has not yet been touched to the point of obedience by the Word of God, he may very well be won for the Lord by the wonderful influence of the good and godly life he sees his wife lead.  

            As was the case with the husband, so it is with the wife.  It is within the marriage relationship that God has placed the blessing of physical intimacy.  In 1 Corinthians 7:1 – 5, the mutual nature of this aspect of the relationship is clearly taught.  The woman has the responsibility to “render due benevolence” to the husband, and the husband must “render due benevolence” to the wife.  This aspect of the marriage relationship must never be used as a weapon by either party.  

            Next week, if the Lord wills, we will discuss the woman’s primary area of responsibility in the marriage relationship.  

                                                                        Greg Litmer


THE GREATEST BATTLEFIELD  

                Much could be said about the many battles of history and the places they were fought.  Mankind has been constantly at odds with himself since his creation by God.  Each battle site is a reminder to us that at one time two opposing forces met.  At the end of their struggle, one force emerged as victor and one was defeated.

Yet the greatest battles, and the greatest battlefields for you and me, are not found on the face of this earth, but rather on the plains of the human heart.  These battles are the decisions we constantly make.  Decisions confront us daily, whether to serve the desires of the carnal man or the desires of the living God.  Only we can determine what type of life we will live and where we will be eternally.


 

 

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