|
THE NORTHERN KENTUCKY SEARCHER VOLUME 2, NUMBER 7, MARCH 17, 2002 I
CAN’T BELIEVE YOU SAID THAT!
In Ephesians 4:29, in the midst of Paul’s discussion of certain of the
attributes that are to characterize the “new self”, the self “created
in righteousness and holiness of the truth”, he wrote, “Let no
unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for
edification according to the need of the moment, that it may give grace to those
who hear.” In Colossians 4:6,
Paul also wrote, “Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned, as it
were, with salt, so that you may know how you should respond to each person.”
Such a magnificent blessing, given to us by God, surely requires
forethought and care before we open our mouths and misuse it.
It never ceases to amaze me how thoughtlessly cruel people can be with
their tongues. There was a time when
I had put on quite a bit of weight. There
was a reason for it that was really nobody’s business, yet several people felt
that it was their business to tell me that I looked fat.
“Boy, you sure put on the weight, didn’t you?”
I guess they thought I didn’t know that.
But the thing is, these were statements made by brethren in a decidedly
off-hand manner and they hurt.
Since that time I have been particularly sensitive to that sort of thing
and there have been so many times when I have thought “I can’t believe you
said that.” I have seen young
sisters reduced to tears because someone thought it was their business to
comment about some weight that they had put on.
I have seen young Christian mothers absolutely deflated because someone
felt compelled to make a comment about their children’s conduct in services
– comments that were not meant to help but were just mean.
I remember a time when a young sister in her mid twenties’ was talking
about her reasons for continuing her education.
As she sat there in the midst of several secretaries, the reason she gave
for going on in school was that she was much too smart to be a secretary.
Well, she may have been too smart to be a secretary, but at that moment
you sure couldn’t have proved it by the evidence of her speech.
Solomon gave tremendous words to live by in Ecclesiastes 5:2.
He wrote, “Do not be hasty in word or impulsive in thought to bring
up a matter in the presence of God. For
God is in heaven and you are on the earth; therefore let your words be few.”
I believe that Solomon was telling us to think before we speak.
Why am I about to say what I am about to say?
It doesn’t mean that every thing we say has to be profound and of great
significance. It doesn’t mean that
there can be no general conversation. But
it does mean that I need to think before I speak.
It does mean that every word that comes out of my mouth needs to be a
good word - a word that is wholesome
in content and design. It does mean,
“That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account
thereof in the day of judgment” (Matt.
It has taken me a long time to learn, and I am still learning it, that
sometimes the best thing I can do is to keep my mouth shut.
That is hard for me to do because if I didn’t like talking I wouldn’t
be a preacher. But I can think of a
lot of times when I just need to be quiet. For
instance, if I am going to talk without thought just to hear the sound of my
voice, I need to keep quiet. If I am
about to say something mean, than I need to keep quiet.
If I am about to answer a bible question when I really don’t know the
answer, I need to be quiet. If I am about to take a shot at someone by my words,
I need to just be quiet. If I am
about to engage in spreading something that I know about someone else, it is
time to keep my mouth shut. If I am
about to say something that is not true, I need to keep my mouth shut.
If I am losing my temper, I need to be quiet.
We could probably all go on and on listing times when we know the right
thing to do is to be quiet.
Let’s conclude with the powerful teaching of James 3:2 – 12.
James wrote, “For we all stumble in many ways.
If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to
bridle the whole body as well. Now
if we put the bits into the horses’ mouths so that they may obey us, we direct
their entire body as well. Behold,
the ships also, though they are so great and are driven by strong winds, are
still directed by a very small rudder, wherever the inclination of the pilot
desires. So also the tongue is a
small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things.
Behold, how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire!
And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set
among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the
course of our life, and is set on fire by hell.
For every species of beasts and birds, or reptiles and creatures of the
sea, is tamed, and has been tamed by the human race.
But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly
poison. With it we bless our Lord
and Father; and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God;
from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing.
My brethren, these things ought not to be this way.
Does a fountain send out from the same opening both fresh and bitter
water? Can a fig tree, my brethren,
produce olives, or a vine produce figs? Neither
can salt water produce fresh.”
|